Why His verses don’t get to us sometimes

Reading the Quran often evokes many different emotions: fear, happiness, joy, anticipation, hope, etc. It's not often that a verse evokes a sense of sadness. However, every time I read the following verse in Surah Maryam, I feel an overwhelming sense of sadness.

Surah Maryam, verses 58:

‎أُولَٰئِكَ الَّذِينَ أَنْعَمَ اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِم مِّنَ النَّبِيِّينَ مِن ذُرِّيَّةِ آدَمَ وَمِمَّنْ حَمَلْنَا مَعَ نُوحٍ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّةِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَإِسْرَائِيلَ وَمِمَّنْ هَدَيْنَا وَاجْتَبَيْنَا إِذَا تُتْلَىٰ عَلَيْهِمْ آيَاتُ الرَّحْمَٰنِ خَرُّوا سُجَّدًا وَبُكِيًّا

"Those were whom Allah bestowed His Grace from among the Prophets, of the offspring of Adam, and of those whom We carried with Noah, and of the offspring of Abraham and Israel and from among those whom We guided and chose. When the Verses of the Most Merciful were recited unto them, they fell down prostrating and weeping."

The verse talks about how the righteous and guided, upon hearing the verses of God, fell in prostration and would begin weeping. Hearing the words of God would move them to their core. They couldn't help but be in awe when verses would be recited. 

This saddens me because when I hear this verse, I cannot help but think, "what happened to us"? Why am I often not emotionally moved by the words of God? Perhaps our hearts have hardened to the point where verses of God do not affect us as they affected those before us. 

As I read this verse and kept questioning myself, searching for an answer to why we are not emotionally moved by His words, I came across the very next verse in the chapter. And there lies the answer to my very own question. 

‎فَخَلَفَ مِن بَعْدِهِمْ خَلْفٌ أَضَاعُوا الصَّلَاةَ وَاتَّبَعُوا الشَّهَوَات

"Then, there a generation came after them who had given up Salah (the prayers) and followed desires..."

God says in the next verse that another generation will come that will neglect their prayers and follow their desires. This verse accurately described problems in our day today. 

I began thinking about my daily routine, my regimen, my prayers, my priorities. Do I pray on time? Do I focus in prayer? What is the status of my relationship with God? Am I in control of my desires? What are my intentions in every action I take? The answer to these questions also answers why we are not moved by the verses of God. We have disconnected from our prayers, our connection to God. We live for life, while our faith is placed on the back burner. Our prayers have become merely an exercise of movements and words we place no thought to. Our prayers are the foundation that puts our life in check. And we have neglected them. 

Reading these verses, comparing the older generation to ours, and contemplating on the state of our affairs, shook me to the core. May God help you and I be in control of our worldly desires, and may He help us build a righteous life with prayers being our priority and center of our daily lives. Perhaps after we do exactly that, we will be able to taste the sweetness of His words as those before us did.

I prayed in a church today

I prayed in a church today. It was 30 minutes before sunset when I realized I still hadn’t prayed Asr prayer, one of the five daily prayers for Muslims that’s prayed in the late afternoon before the sun sets. I was at a church this particular afternoon planning an event with mothers of various faiths and backgrounds for our children who were born with rare medical conditions. We dedicated a good chunk of this day to work together and come up with ideas for our special event on World Rare Disease Day.

What was beautiful though, as we were wrapping up and as I realized I was about to miss my Asr prayer, is these amazing women’s response to my dilemma of how to not miss my prayer. They watched my two daughters as I hurried to the bathroom to make wudu (ablution before the prayer) and as I came back in the room to perform the prayer, one of them looked out the window observing the sun and its definitiveness to set and proclaimed, “You better hurry.” I agreed and quickly began my prayer.

Here I was, an American Muslim, in a church of God, a Presbyterian Christian Church to be specific, praying one of the five daily prayers in Islam. Unity and diversity doesn’t get much better than this.

In the moments I prayed in the church, I couldn’t help but thank God for placing me in a peaceful place with such women of love and sincerity who God Himself chose to be mothers of rare children. What an honor to be amongst such advocates and warriors. And I couldn’t help but think of Prophets Jesus and Muhammad who came with a message of mercy and inclusion. I was reminded of the verses I recently read in chapter three of the Quran where Prophet Muhammad was addressing a group of Christians to come to peaceful terms together, worshipping One God and not associating any partners with Him.

In my prayer today, I regained my faith in humanity, in loving, empowering and supporting each other, and in the incredible strength of diversity. Alhamdulillah, all thanks to God.

#theycantdivideus #interfaith #abrahamicfaiths #lovewillprevail #thepowerofprayer #freedomofreligion #God #Jesus #Muhammad 

The dua Of Maryam’s mother

Do you know what’s amazing about the mother of Maryam (Mary)? This woman had a vision that she would have a pious son with a legacy. When she was pregnant, Maryam’s mother believed her child was a boy and she took an oath saying she would dedicate this boy’s life for God. She envisioned him studying under the knowledge of Rabbis and righteous people to learn and eventually teach about God. Now what happens next in the story is amazing.

God gives her a girl. In this moment, any of us could be upset at God for not answering our prayers the way we imagined. We could possibly take away all our wants of that child being raised for God. We could ask God why He would shatter a dream that was for His sake at the end?!

But that’s not what this woman did. Her child’s gender didn’t stop her from chasing after her vision. She still sent Maryam to study and learn about God. Because it wasn’t about the gender, and it wasn’t about God answering her prayers in the exact way she wanted. It was much bigger than that.

It’s at this time in the story where Prophet Zachariah is given responsibility of taking care of Maryam. Perhaps if Maryam were a boy, she would not have had that one on one with a righteous Prophet of God. Perhaps God heard the dua (supplication) of Maryam’s mother and answered it in the way He knew was best. And she trusted that.

Fast forward a few years and now Maryam is a pious woman and she herself is teaching Prophet Zachariah an important lesson: God grants who He wills in ways beyond imagination. This in turn motivates Zachariah to ask God for a son, despite his old age and his wife being barren. God answers his prayer and grants him a son, to which he replied with bewilderment as how God could possibly do that. But Maryam taught him that nothing is impossible for God. And she was living proof of that.

Maryam then underwent the impossible herself and carried the huge honor of bringing Prophet Jesus to life without a father. And through him God revealed the Gospel, helping him change society for the better, instilling faith and mercy in people’s hearts.

Now think back to the beginning of this story. This amazing legacy started from one woman who had a vision. And although her vision wasn’t implemented in the way she imagined, she let God facilitate. She was loyal and determined to what she dreamed of and at the same time, trusted that her faith wouldn’t let her down. Her dream of having a righteous son then turned into giving birth to the most honorable woman in history who would give birth to a righteous son without a father, who would then be a prophet and make a lasting impact on the world till the end of time. Wow.

Moral of the story. Don’t give up on your duas. They may not be answered in the way you want them to. They may look different in the way they’re being facilitated. But trust the Planner. He knows what He’s doing and He wants what’s best for you. 

Powerful lessons from Surah Alwaqi’ah

Check out this latest talk as we find some amazing treasures in chapter 56 of the Quran!

Navigating life through the Quran and the Stars: Powerful lessons from Surah Alwaqi’ah

https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=SJ_AhTLdfpM

To Him we belong and to Him we return

Written on 6/6/18

I remember this day distinctly. I had moved out of home several years ago and lived 9 hours away from my parents by car. It was hard leaving them and my hometown initially and I never fully got over it. I was visiting them at home for Ramadan and was making a list of duas (supplications) to make during prayer. I was super excited about this one specific Dua. I very excitedly went to my mom to tell her this new Dua I was making. It was, “Oh God, return me to my family in a beautiful way.” My hopes out of this prayer was that maybe my parents would soon move to where I was or that we would move closer to them. Little did I know my mom’s reply would impact me in such a powerful way. She replied so instantaneously advising me to change the wording of the supplication. She said to ask God to return me back to Him, not my family, because it’s in Him where my Home is. I didn’t truly belong to her she added, for I came from God and one day we will all return to Him. This is one of the most profound statements my mom has ever told me and every time I remember it, it hits me. I was reminded of this Dua yesterday during prayer at the mosque when the Imam leading the prayer asked God to return us back to Him in a beautiful way. I pray we never lose sight of our true Home, our Creator, the Most Merciful, the One who gifted us with our families and loved ones. 

We know you are sad

Written on 6/9/18

You know what’s so interesting about the Quran is that not only is it a religious scripture where we can gather information about faith and doing good, but it’s also a school for learning about psychology and ourselves. There are countless stories of prophets and their dealings with surroundings that teach us that a huge part of our faith is in our interactions with humanity. And what I find most interesting is the way God speaks to Prophet Muhammad in the Quran. Prophet Muhammad was a walking mercy for his people. He was chosen by God to be the final messenger. He was guaranteed eternal bliss in the highest of heavens. But still amidst all this, Allah tells him in the Quran as he faced hardship, “We know you are saddened at what they say.” When the prophet was going through a hard time and disheartened at the people’s rejection of him and faith, it could have been easy for people to tell him something like, “Hey, you don’t have anything to be sad about, you’re literally guaranteed paradise.”  But instead, God validates his feelings and reaches out to his emotions. God acknowledges his pain. He tells him, “We KNOW you are sad.” And sometimes, that’s all you need: someone to tell you that you have a right to feel the way you are feeling. Just because we don’t understand why someone is sad doesn’t mean they don’t have the right to be sad. I think this is why so many people can feel so alone in their feelings. But the way God consoles the Prophet in verses like these teaches us that invalidation does no good. We see that in people of all ages who struggle with their emotions and feel invalidation from their peers. And here, in our scripture, in this glorious Quran, we see God Himself taking Prophet Muhammad’s emotions in and validating Him in the simplest yet most profound of ways. If you have a loved one struggling, acknowledge their pain, validate their emotions, and let them know they’re not alone in their feelings. They have every right to feel the way they feel, so start from there.

A supplication so powerful

Written on 11/1/18

As I was driving to the hospital for a short procedure for my daughter, I looked in the mirror and saw the look of exhaustion and loneliness. Alone in my thoughts, in my tiredness, in the bags under my eyes, in the tears I keenly carry in those eyes. Suddenly, as the morning prayers (athkar alsabah) were peacefully playing in the background, I heard the supplication: “يا حي يا قيوم برحمة أستغيث أصلح لي شأني كله ولا تكلني إلى نفسي طرفة عين." "Oh Ever-Living, Sustainer and supporter of all, I seek assistance through Your Mercy, rectify all of my affairs for me and do not let me depend on myself alone even for a blink of an eye.”

Wow, how incredibly powerful. If no one but Allah can see my eyes in their form, in their tiredness, and HE is the only one to depend on, the only ever-living and sustaining, then my worries suddenly dissipate to the background. How eloquently and poetically worded is this prayer? My mom often advised me to read this supplication when in distress, and today I finally know why. While driving, I slowly dissected each word of this supplication and was amazed that the prophet asked us to first call upon God in that specific name, the only one who will never cease. And next we ask His help through nothing but His mercy. And we ask Him to fix our affairs, without even naming them because He knows them all, and finally ask him to not leave us alone even for a blink. How healing of a supplication for someone who is feeling so alone and hopeless.

I am no where near this mindset 24/7, but I pray this prayer and prayers like these can be something we as submitters to God hold on to.  

Not wanting to live

Written on 11/18/18

Thoughts of not wanting to live are real. They exist in our loved ones, our family, friends, colleagues, in our community, in our societies at large, and sometimes even in ourselves. But what if I told you those thoughts also exist in the Quran? In the book God sent for guidance. And by one of the most honorable woman in the world. In Maryam, Mary, the mother of Jesus. The one God named a whole chapter after in the Quran. The one God calls the chosen one in the Quran. In Chapter Maryam, verse 23, Maryam cries out:

يَا لَيْتَنِي مِتُّ قَبْلَ هَٰذَا وَكُنتُ نَسْيًا مَّنسِيًّا
“I wish I had died before this and became long forgotten and non existent.” How did God reply? Imagine if He replied like so many people around us would reply to someone in a state of depression that has gotten so bad to the point where they didn’t want to live? What if God said, “Be grateful, look at the positives, it’s all in your head, you’re literally the chosen one.” Instead, He immediately sends help. And the verse specifically mentions someone under her. As if someone is getting down to her level.

فَنَادَاهَا مِن تَحْتِهَا أَلَّا تَحْزَنِي قَدْ جَعَلَ رَبُّكِ تَحْتَكِ سَرِيًّا
“Then he called to her from below her, saying: Don’t be distressed. Your Lord has made a stream under you.”

Someone is coming to understand her. He sends her an angel to comfort her. And here comes lesson one. When you see someone in this situation, give them COMPANY. Comfort them. What does that company tell her in the verse? “Don’t be distressed.” He acknowledges that she’s sad and in a state of misery. Validate that feeling. Next, he reassures her and tells her God has created a stream under her. He gave her hope. Water is always a good sign. Something to quench your thirst, both physically and metaphorically speaking. And the next thing he tells her is amazing.

وَهُزِّي إِلَيْكِ بِجِذْعِ النَّخْلَةِ تُسَاقِطْ عَلَيْكِ رُطَبًا جَنِيًّا
“And shake the trunk of the palm-tree toward you, ripe dates will fall upon you.”

He gives her an action item. A to-do list. Shake the palm tree and ripened dates will fall out for you. Do this in order to get the fruit. Motivate. Help them get up on their feet. Then, as the verses continue:

فَكُلِي وَاشْرَبِي وَقَرِّي عَيْنًا فَإِمَّا تَرَيِنَّ مِنَ الْبَشَرِ أَحَدًا فَقُولِي إِنِّي نَذَرْتُ لِلرَّحْمَٰنِ صَوْمًا فَلَنْ أُكَلِّمَ الْيَوْمَ إِنسِيًّا
“So eat and drink and comfort your eye. And if you see someone, say “I have vowed to fast for the most Merciful (a name mentioned in this Chapter repeatedly but that’s for another post), and I will speak today to no one.””

What we can derive from this is that she didn’t have to explain her situation to anyone. Who cares if people want to talk? If you’re on the right path, and more than that, God’s path, then you don’t have to explain anything to anybody. People will always talk, so save yourself the time and don’t talk back. Stay focused on your mission. And that’s to get back up on your feet and know God is on your side.

Now how are these for ingredients for someone in a mental crisis?! I have been reflecting on these few verses for a while but would love any other observations and feedback or reflections.

*There are some narrations that suggest it may have been Jesus himself who spoke to her instead of the angel, but the majority of tafseers I read agreed it was an angel. And God knows best.

A comforting ending with Alrahman

Written on 11/28/18

Months ago, I lost my grandmother and began struggling with my faith. Images of facing God were haunting me as I thought of being alone in my own grave. As I was listening to verses from the Quran one day, one particular verse frightened me and shook me to my core. It talked about how every individual will be accountable for their own deeds and will one day meet God alone.

‎وَكُلُّهُمْ آتِيهِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ فَرْدًا
“Every one of them will come before Him alone on the Day of Assembly.” [19:95]

For some reason, that thought made me uncomfortable. I felt an overwhelming sensation of guilt. I could see all my sins weighing on me and couldn’t fathom meeting God while carrying them. The concept of being alone scared me most.

I phoned a friend and explained my discomfort to her, and immediately without hesitation she asked me to read the two verses that precede the verse I was fearful of. “Who does God say will account you individually?” she asked. I read the verses.

‎إِن كُلُّ مَن فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضِ إِلَّا آتِي الرَّحْمَٰنِ
‎عَبْدًا
‎لَّقَدْ أَحْصَاهُمْ وَعَدَّهُمْ عَدًّا
‎وَكُلُّهُمْ آتِيهِ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ فَرْدًا
“There is not a single being in the heavens nor on the earth except that it must come as a servant to the Compassionate. He counted them and numbered them all precisely. Every one of them will come before Him alone on the Day of Assembly.” [19:93-95]

Who will we return to alone? Al-Rahman, the most Gracious and the most Compassionate. The one full of Mercy. From all the names God could have used to describe Himself in these verses, He uses the one embedded with mercy, grace, and forgiveness. I was speechless, absolutely blown away. Suddenly, the images of loneliness and the heaviness of my sins began to wash away as I thought of the most Compassionate. That one verse that scared me so much has now become one of my biggest hopes and sources of comfort. What a blessing to know the souls of our loved ones and our own individual souls will be with none other than Al-Rahman, the most Compassionate.

#Alhumdulilah #ThankyouGod #Al-Rahman #ChooseMercy

The Mercy in Surah Maryam

How does God address Maryam’s thoughts of not wanting to live in the Quran? How do we cope with being alone when we die? Which name of God is mentioned in Surah Maryam more than in any other chapter in the Quran? How does Prophet Zachariah embody the concept of vulnerability in his heartfelt supplication to God? 

Dive into Surah Maryam with us in this video to see how it beautifully answers all these questions and more :)

https://youtu.be/wp0WMJskPdA

Bringing life after death

Written on December 18, 2018

What do you think of when you see a lifeless tree come back to life again? Or when you witness a withering flower blossom soon after? Or when you notice a branch stripped of every sign of life grow green leaves once again? We are witnessing God. We are witnessing His ability, His wisdom, His precision, His mercy.

God says in the Quran, Chapter 30, verse 50:
فَانظُرْ إِلَىٰ آثَارِ رَحْمَتِ اللَّهِ كَيْفَ يُحْيِي الْأَرْضَ بَعْدَ مَوْتِهَا إِنَّ ذَٰلِكَ لَمُحْيِي الْمَوْتَىٰ وَهُوَ عَلَىٰ كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ
“So look at the results of God’s mercy, how He brings life back to the earth after its death. Verily the same will bring life to the dead. And He is capable of all things.”

When we examine nature around us coming back to life, we are filled with hope and beauty. Think of a sunny beautiful day in spring just weeks after a rainy gloomy day in winter. The change in life around us is awe inspiring.

Now think of your life. Your death. Your return to God. Suddenly, life after death doesn’t sound as magical. But what if, what if, IT IS that magical?! In this verse, after Allah tells us to examine His mercy in the resurrection happening to the nature in front of us, He compares that to our own resurrection. What if just like the new life in spring we love to see, our lives after death will be just as becoming and just as blossoming?

Perhaps the unseen part is what scares us most. But what gives us hope is His promise in this verse. And in so many verses in the Quran. And in the creation around us. And in the fact that every new leaf growing is a witness to His infinite mercy.

What’s also beautiful about this verse is that God says to look at the remnants or results of His mercy. Results come after something. Maybe after a life full of meaning for you and me. A life full of faith, and hope. A life full of ups and downs, rises and falls, battling the storms of life. But never forgetting that this isn’t our spring season yet. We are seeds being watered. And we will sprout when we return to Him.

May we blossom so effortlessly when we meet Him. Ameen.